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Make the ask

I've had friends tell me they want to apply for a certain role at a company, but are holding back from doing so because they feel they would be rejected. I've heard similar apprehensions about asking for a raise or a promotion, asking for funding for a startup, submitting a manuscript to a publisher, etc. 

When we feel such an apprehension, we first need to validate the basis for it. It could be based on evidence where we have seen someone in a very similar situation to us being rejected. Or it could simply be because we are afraid of being rejected. 

If the reason is grounded on evidence of the possible outcome, then we should channel that apprehension into identifying what reasons lead to the rejection and then chart a plan to overcome those reasons, so that we no longer have to feel the apprehension.

If the reason is grounded in fear alone, then we should just make the ask. 

Often, we end up neither making the ask nor charting an improvement plan, and simply wallow in the self-inflicted disappointment. 

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